January 28

Full house today. Mom and dad headed off to their regular 7am meeting. I’m living in a house of (relative to me) early risers! They were clomping around outside my room at 6am, so today was an early day for me, too! I joined dad, Bob, and Charlie at breakfast, and saw dad off to his meeting. I then found a quiet space in Hunter’s room where I was able to read the paper and drink coffee. It’s a fine balance – sometimes all I want is to be surrounded by lots and lots of people. Other times all I need is some quiet and peace of mind. Today I felt overwhelmed by the amount of loving support in the house. 

Dad got back from radiation around 9:30, and was in bed when I got back home around 9:45. Dave, Bob, dad, and I have been working on setting up a bike for me to get around on, and we’ve started working on Miles’s old Bianchi Pista. It’s tiny, so there are a few more steps needed before it’s comfy and commutable. So, when I walked into the room where dad was resting, he immediately pushed for us to go to the bike store. It was a good idea to get it done, he rationalized, despite his pervasive exhaustion and low affect. As much as I want to hang out on University Ave with dad, and as much as I wanted to get this bike set up, it really wasn’t a good idea to go in today. Dad is wiped, but I’m not sure he recognizes the extent of his exhaustion. In many ways, he’s playing host to all the dear ones who are staying at the house and visiting. We’re all working on prioritizing his sleep before anything else. 

Though we didn’t leave the house again today, there was a lot of energy throughout the day. Shingo and Isabel came by for a nice visit. Isabel is a nurse, and has this ability to soothe dad and I. And Shingo has been family for years and years, and has been spending a lot of time surfing these days. He shared some stories with dad about his latest surfing exploits. 

On his way home from radiation, dad picked up an Apple TV to set up in our playroom. We don’t have TV in our house, but dad’s hankering to sit down to a (very, very Ken sort of) movie: Ashes and Dust? Or maybe the name is Loneliness and Ashes. Whatever the specific name, it takes place in Poland in WW2 and was made in the 50s. Also, it can only be picked up at the local library. Any takers? I think I’ll sit this one out. 

After Isabel and I set up the new Apple TV, we all had a casual lunch. Danny arrived to give dad a (oh-so-very needed) shower. At this point, I headed off to find some quiet. I find it’s tough to maintain balance and peace these days, though I’m certainly appreciative of all the extra help. 

Dad spent the rest of the day sharing stories with Isabel, Shingo, Danny, Bob, and Charlie. His appetite seems to have quieted a bit today. Otherwise, he’s still walking with fluidity! In terms of his presence and spirit today, I experienced him as more subdued than this weekend, though far more engaged from the last week. Here I go seeking out trends again. He was happy to spend the day with his people, and we’re all happy now that he’s happy, and showered.

Onward to Wednesday.

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